Yawn... I wake up.. Approximate time 7:04am. The tv is still on from the night before on and some god awful show is on that is annoying me even at quiet volumes. I turn off the tv. I fall in and out of consciousness for the next 20 minutes refusing to start the day and doing whatever I can to trick myself into believing if I pretend to sleep long enough maybe I wont have to go to work. I relent at around 7:17am. I gather some clothes that I plan on wearing for the day and put them in the bathroom. Boxers, beater, socks. All the usual suspects. I start the water in the shower so it will be nice and warm for when I get in out of the cold from starting my vehicle. I throw on a hoodie and some pants. I go outside. My vehicle is covered in a layer of snow from the night before. I make my way to it thinking of my toasty warm shower waiting for me, and what will be my toasty warm vehicle after it has run for 15 minutes. Life is good. I unlock the door and reach in to the ignition. The morning goes downhill. Yes, I realize I deserve a Darwin Award for this one. That is pretty much the reason I am so pissed off about this whole situation and require venting via the gong show. My Jeep starts without having to push the clutch in. Awesome feature eh? Not so much. Many, many times I have gone to start my Jeep and it has been left in gear, it lurches forward a bit, I take it out of gear, no worries. I always start my Jeep standing outside of it because I am too lazy to haul my ass into it when I don't have to. I turn the key. Reminiscent of Stephen King's Christine the vehicle instantly jumps to life. It moves forward. I reach for the shifter trying to throw it into neutral. It isn't so easy because it is moving in gear and I can't push the clutch in because my lazy ass is standing outside the Jeep if you recall. My Jeep slows down via impact. I take two hands and jerk the shifter into neutral. Crap. I have struck something. Hmm wasn't Jami's car parked in front of me? Double crap. Now having not hit the throttle at all the movement of the vehicle was quite slow. I am thinking some scuffs and whatnot probably some re-painting. What an inconvenience. Enter Satan and his cursed inventions, the bush bumper and the winch. I walk around the front of the Jeep to see I have pushed Jami's car about a foot an a half forward, collapsed her trunk enough that you could see inside of it, toasted a taillight and folder the corner of her rear fender. High five for me.
Jeep & Bush Bumper - 1
Me - 0
Jami's car - Injury Reserve