Author Topic: Things that piss you off  (Read 35400 times)

Offline Drew

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Things that piss you off
« Reply #30 on: November 24, 2005, 10:25:11 PM »
Alright, how about those long descriptive msn names?  I mean the ones that go on for like three lines that go into detail about everything they have done for the past six years of their life and describe what they are going to do next, which is always guaranteed to be something inane.

An example to illustrate:  "Jane Doe - went to teh partyzz last night omg lolz it wsa awesom cuz joe was dere he is sooo hot lol!11 today going to make a sadnwich and tehn watch some tv with rebecca you go girlie you are so hawt llololol :) then prolly taking a nap then going to teh mallz"

At the risk of being sexist or ignorant (a risk I realize I take at least every 10 minutes) these are normally women, hence the "Jane" in my example.  To steal a saying from Bob (I'm an unoriginal bastard like that) these names make me want to drink bleach.

Nobody cares!  Go write a fucking blog or something!  Oh God I realized that I hate those things too...might have to deal with that in a future post.  But until then, make sure you delete these people from your msn lists pronto.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have some death to defy.

Offline Bob

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Things that piss you off
« Reply #31 on: November 24, 2005, 11:38:16 PM »
I was actually going to throw that one down myself. But well done I say.

My rant of the day.

Sure this may be stereo-typing but let's be honest. Americans. Seriously, everyone in Canada knows damn well the USA has their thanksgiving in november while we have ours in October but there isnt one damn american that could tell you that. "Why doesn't Canada have a 4th of July"  We do you bastards.It may not be a holiday here but the day still passes.  We just dont all get more drunk then usual and launch fireworks at our neighbours houses. It makes me want to bomb them from my igloo.

The following are clips that confirm my obvious correctness.
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Offline Skywalker

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Things that piss you off
« Reply #32 on: November 25, 2005, 12:56:59 AM »
Well at least there's one American we can like... that kid who interrupts his mother "hang on... Canada has provinces."  Maybe all hope is not lost.

Offline Ryan

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« Reply #33 on: November 25, 2005, 01:33:48 AM »
Oh no, I would have to say all hope is indeed lost. I mean, if they can actually think we are to the south of them, give me a break....  Very funny stuff though, definitely keeping those to do some good ol' American bashing!
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Offline Mikal

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« Reply #34 on: November 25, 2005, 07:05:56 PM »
Alright, this one is for all the ignorant mothers and fathers out there.

 If you have baby or small child with you, and it's screaming at the top of it's lungs cause you won't buy it (insert useless item) what it wants, just ignoring it makes everyone around you want to shake your child to death. These parents should be forced to undergo some sort of operation to remove there sexual organs and have an implant inserted into there ears that plays only crying babies at different volumes all day long..

 Just a thought.
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Offline Drew

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Things that piss you off
« Reply #35 on: November 26, 2005, 05:20:57 PM »
Sobriety.

That's right folks, I contend that this was not meant to be Man's (or Woman's) natural state of being, and that really gets my proverbial goat.  

Ever wake up in the morning and not want to go to work/school/court like you are suppposed to?  That is because you are missing some of the liquid motivation that your body so desperately needs.

Drunk is clearly the superior alternative.  Think of all the things that alchohol can do for you:  help you sing, help you dance, make you irresistable to the opposite sex, increases your driving skills, and makes you at least 10 times smarter (this is a modest estimate of the powers of this liquid brain juice).

To further my point let us turn to a couple of definitions:

Sober adj.:  Not intoxicated or affected by the use of drugs; marked by seriousness, gravity, or solemnity of conduct or character; basically the state of being a general wanker and having no friends whatsoever; having little marked purpose in life; in short BORING.

Drunk adj.:  Intoxicated with alcoholic liquor to the point of impairment of physical and mental faculties; the state of being when thousands of women want to sleep with you because you are suddenly way too sexy; reaching a supreme level of happiness and inner peace; basically you are now a God.

I don't know about you people, but I know which I would choose in a pinch.

So in conclusion, down with sobriety and all hail drunkenness.  Do yourself's a favour and drop whatever you are doing and go get plastered right now.  The world will be a better place tomorrow I promise.  :drunk:
Now if you'll excuse me, I have some death to defy.

Offline Bob

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Things that piss you off
« Reply #36 on: November 28, 2005, 05:06:42 PM »
People that dont know who Chuck Norris is.
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Offline Jami

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« Reply #37 on: November 28, 2005, 11:12:29 PM »
Quote
People that dont know who Chuck Norris is.
[snapback]1818[/snapback]

Whatever! Chuck Norris sucks!
I like chicken!

Offline Drew

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« Reply #38 on: November 28, 2005, 11:34:51 PM »
First off, bad Jami!  I sense a roundhouse kick to the face in your near future and we dare not stand in his way.

Now to the real business.  This one will be brief because I have the attention span of a goldfish today, deal with it.

People who can't use virus scanning programs.  I swear the number of people who pop up on my messenger and send viruses through email is retarded.  At least once a week I hear someone bitching about their computer being slow.

I can't comprehend this for the life of me.  It's not like these programs are hard to use.  You install and it pretty much does everything.  I don't think I have ever gotten a single virus on my computer.  This leads me to the inescapable conclusion that these people are just plain dumb and that pisses me off.

Of course I am sure that these are the exact same people who buy the most expensive computer on the market but can barely use Microsoft Word and then bother me about stupid formatting issues.  I didn't realize it was that fucking hard to figure out how to double space your document.  Or heaven forbid you learn keyboard shortcuts.  

That's another thing...people who insist on highlighting a sentence with the mouse then right clicking and clicking copy then moving the cursor and right clicking and clicking paste.  In the time it takes them I could copy and paste 20 things.  Argh, people have to take a test before they are allowed to use a computer.  For that matter there should be a test before people are allowed to interact with me.  If you fail it means you will likely piss me off and should therefore be shot.

Okay I guess that wasn't as short as I expected.  Guess I got a little carried away.  Until next time.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have some death to defy.

Offline Ryan

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« Reply #39 on: November 29, 2005, 05:20:08 AM »
Ah I just thought of one while looking at the draw for the Junior Southern Alberta Playdowns.  I would have been eligible to play this year if the dipshits who run the show in this nation wouldn't have been too fucking lazy to fill out some paper work and match up the age restriction with the rest of the world.  Thanks to those jackasses, the playdowns are filled with terrible teams that I could have steam-rolled with a 3 man team.  Props to the CCA for biting the big one and depriving me of another chance to make the most amazing quadruple ever at Provincials, as well as depriving the eventual Canadian champions, as they will be at a disadvantage in comparison to the rest of the world.   :fingers:
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Offline Aquabat

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« Reply #40 on: November 29, 2005, 07:40:18 AM »
You know what pisses me off, Curlers..............
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Offline Ryan

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« Reply #41 on: November 29, 2005, 09:04:59 PM »
YOU SLUT!!! Here you invite me into your prestigious group, only to do that?? HURL INSULTS AT ME?!?!?!?  Why I outta.....   :chainsaw:
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Offline Mikal

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« Reply #42 on: December 03, 2005, 09:51:18 PM »
While sitting at my shitty job, watching shitty people walk by, I saw an old couple meander by. They were like any older couple, white haired and good spirited. But these two had done something so hanious, so outrageous, i had to rant about it. Why do old people wear the same Jackets as one another. Really, I can find no logic in it.
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Offline RKSS

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« Reply #43 on: December 13, 2005, 05:03:58 PM »
PEOPLE THAT DONT POST FUNNY VIDEOS!!!!!!!!!!

Offline Drew

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« Reply #44 on: February 14, 2006, 07:56:41 PM »
In the spirit of our revival I felt it was necessary to bring you back a topic that once was, and still is, near and dear to my heart.

Today I was reflecting on the Olympics.  Now the Olympics themselves don't piss me off, it's the people that watch the Olympics.

Notice how all of a sudden everyone becomes an expert on sports overnight as soon as they watch their first Olympic broadcast of the year?  Yesterday I was at school in the student lounge watching the speed skating.  Of course Wotherspoon was supposed to get a medal and after his first skate he was ranked fifth.  This caused innumberable people (see:  fat chicks) to start to complain and criticize:  "Oh he wasn't trying hard enough...if I was at the Olympics I would at least try my best".

Excuse me?  You get out of breath walking to class and yet these athletes aren't trying hard enough for you?  How about you shut the fuck up and I won't kick you in the fucking teeth.

I swear to God...I dare the next ignorant armchair athelete to piss me off.  Then they can win a gold medal in getting their ass stomped by yours truly.  Bring that home for Canada bitch.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have some death to defy.